Megan Fox

The Transformers have Fallen and they can’t get up

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
  • IMDB: link

transformers-revenge-of-the-fallen-posterI hated Michael Bay’s first Transformers, and this second installment is more of the same only longer, louder, sleazier, and (if possible) dumber.

Part Deux is filled with lazy humor, cheap gags (such as multiple shots of humping dogs and robots), a confusing and ridiculous plot (which is so inane characters twice have to stop and explain it not only to us but each other), big, though not too impressive, special effects, and little else. It’s obvious that Bay and screenwriters Ehren Kruger, Roberto Orci, and Alex Kurtzman love robots (wait, it took three of you to write this movie?). What isn’t obvious is if they give two shits about Transformers, or their fans.

Once again we’re given a plot which has more to do with Sam (Shia LaBeouf) learning a life-lesson and Megan Fox looking hot than Autobots or Decepticons. In fact the Decepticons aren’t even the big baddie here, it’s the Fallen. What is the Fallen? Well, you see, he’s one of a race of seven Primes, ancient Transformer brothers… (the sound you just heard was me dying a little inside).

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Less, Far Less, Than Meets the Eye

/ / Movie Reviews
  • Title: Transformers
  • IMDb: link

As a kid I had Transformers toys, I watched the television series without fail, and collected the original Marvel Comics Transformers series (all 80 issues and those lame cross-over mini-series too!).  So the fanboy in me was ecstatic when I learned that a live-action film of the comics, television show, and toys I grew up with was going to be attempted.  But when I heard that Michael Bay was going to head the project I felt less than thrilled.  Remember, this is from the guy who defended The Island, but I still doubted whether Bay could translate the stories of my youth to the big screen.  I shouldn’t have worried because he didn’t even try.  There isn’t a single recognizable moment from the Transformers of my childhood other than you’ve got robots that transform into objects and vehicles.  I am deeply saddened that Bay and his writers didn’t trust the source material and the original character designs and mythology choosing instead to throw out over twenty-years of history to do it their own way.  The result is less, far less, than meets the eye.

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