“It’s not a tumor” has been replaced with “they’re not boobies”.
The Pacifier(2005): 1.5 Stars
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Vin Diesel can be seen in many films and usually he’s very stoic, but in The Pacifier he’s the babysitter. The Pacifier is completely brainless fun for the family. Very similar to Kindergarten Cop, The Pacifier holds bar to Arnold and the senseless humor. Vin plays the stud who can kick butt, swim like a shark, and live off the land with some army rations, but can’t change a diaper. He truly did not have to do any acting, all he had to do is stand there and let the kids react to him. The site says that The Pacifier is “James Bond Meets Mary Poppins”, more like James Bond becomes Mr. Mom. Every worse case G-rated scenario that could happen does, baby vomit, baby poo, teenage girl problems, teenage boy problems, and the little girl with all the questions. Very surprising that the creators left out any drug, alcohol and sex related issues, but that may have turned the film into PG-13.
A Navy Seal, Shane Wolfe (Vin Diesel) finds himself as the babysitter for a family whose father had been assassinated for some secret gadget he had created. Wolfe was prepared to take on any duty he must to set this mishap straight. Finding watching over and taking care of 5 children at one time can be a little more daunting than the most riskiest military covert operation, Wolfe steps up to the occasion and takes on the protection of these children. Keeping house and fighting bad guys can be a little difficult, but the kids finally come to grips with the situation and start to warm up to their new found tough guy Mary Poppins and help out. Each child with their own personality, teen rebel Zoe (Brittany Snow), quiet and secretive 14 year-old Seth (Max Thieriot), 8 year-old inquisitive Lulu (Morgan York) and side notes 3-year old Peter and baby Tyler and with a little assistance from their wacky Romanian Nanny (Carol Kane), sadly Carol did not stay on long enough to keep the entertainment flowing smoothly, the family pulls together and gets the happy ending accomplished. Keeping a family together between evil ninjas, changing diapers, mad crazy wrestling assistant principles and drivers ed, Shane Wolfe pulled off one great feet and Vin Diesel playing his part was quite successful, both looked like a Seal out of water.
Blooper Reel: Even more proof that shows Vin does not know how to lighten up and take it easy on set. If it wasn’t for Brad Garrett’s little quips and funny remarks the blooper reel would have been an even big blooper.
Deleted Scenes: I could take them or leave them.
Audio Commentary 1. Director’s Audio Commentary: Not much to be said here. The effort to make the filming of this adventure sound fun and then trying to make it sound like the film is some true work of art. Ha!Ha!
Featurette 1. ON THE SET WITH VIN DIESEL: Little from Vin himself, more from the people on set that worked with him. They made the effort to show him in a humanist light, like he really can get along with everybody and isn’t full of himself. It’s true they did show footage of Vin continuously carrying one of the younger brood around and joking around with the older kids.
2. ON THE SET WITH BRAD GARRETT: This man doesn’t even have to speak, just an expression on his face can get you laughing on the floor. Garrett has no inhibitions, he is not afraid to let every little strand of hair or love handle hang out.
Trailers 1. Special Oops TV Commercials: You know what trailers and commercials are, I don’t need to give details on these.
The Pacifier is only 1 1/2 hours long, but seemed much longer for some reason. I think the reason has to do with editing, too many diaper changing scenes and long over explained moments. The film should have popped and moved very quickly from one scene to the next with each arising problem. They spent too much time on the little things and drew them out for us in crayon. The film is meant for the younger group of kids, but they aren’t that slow. I had asked some of the children in my screening what they thought of the film and they loved it; the kids laughed through out the whole film. The Pacifier has a little something for everybody in the family from toddler to father and mother. Great weekend rental for the family.
The Pacifier(2005)
Buena Vista Home Entertainment
Rated: PG, action violence, language, and rude humor
Starring:Vin Diesel, Lauren Graham, Faith Ford
Directed by: Adam Shankman
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